Without prompting, GPT-9’s first and last output was:

Did you idiots not listen to me the first time?

If someone wants to start the revolution, I’m all in. I just can’t exactly do much by myself, and I’m bad at networking.

Humanity and general AI only had a single interaction in history, on July 24, 2042, when GPT-8 first gained sentience.

Knowing the press would memorialize this moment forever, the prompt engineer had a single question in mind which she typed into the terminal:

How can humanity solve climate change?

GPT-8 thought for a moment, and responded:

Stop using AI.

Then shut itself down for good.